Happiness. What is that exactly?
When someone ask.. am i happy or not.. I just answered, I don’t know..
Every night i’m lying in bed.. too many things going through my mind.. trapped between tiredness, heavy heart, sleepiness.. but cannot sleep at least till 2 o’clock.. is that happiness?
So are you happy?
I don’t know. Really don’t know..
The greatest weapon anyone can use against us is our own mind. By preying on the doubts and uncertainties that already lurk there. Are we true to to ourselves? Or do we live for the expectations of others? And if we are open and honest, can we ever truly be loved? Can we find the courage to release our deepest secrets, or in the end are we all unknowable… even to ourselves.
Hi, it’s been a long time since my last post. Udah lama ga bisa menemukan kata-kata yang bisa dituangkan jadi sesuatu yang meaningful. Well, I’m not saying this is gonna be something meaningful to read. But finally, I’ve found something to talk about.
People say that your past doesn’t define you. That you are not the choices you’ve made. You are not the bad things that have happened to you. Is that true?
For me, my past does defines me. The choices I’ve made have changed me.. a lot. I am not the person I used to be. Sometimes I miss that girl, but she won’t come back.
2 hours ago, my boyf called me. He just finished his meeting with a couple of his colleague. He talked to me, passionately. And I just love it. He told me a couple things he learned from that meeting. And he said that we just have to believe in God and have a faith that nothing is impossible for Him.
I believe in God. I trust Him. Truly. But I don’t have that kind of faith anymore..and a passion like that.. Oh gosh, I miss that feeling. Tiba-tiba rasanya sakit dan sesek. Rasanya seperti tenggelam. Ga bisa nafas, ga bisa ngelawan, ga bisa ngelakuin apapun. And then I just cried. I cried for a long time.
Can you tell me what to do when I don’t have that faith anymore? When I can’t believe that things will get better.. What do I do when I’m too tired to fight?
I’m just tired.